I came to the conclusion late last year that it was time for me to get off Facebook. I've been involved in more than a few conflicts over the past several years on that particular social media website, and I realize now that's not a good place for me to be. Truthfully, I don't think it's a good place for a lot of people to be. I don't attach any blame to the designers or owners of the website per se. It just seems to me that, human nature being what it is, that type of format tends to bring out the worst in people.
Don't get me wrong. The site can work well for a lot of things. But we live in emotional times, and people post emotional things. And sometimes people reply with emotional things. There is controversy. I don't consider that a bad thing myself. For some reason, however, a lot of people on social media seem to forget in the middle of controversy that there are real people on the other end of the web.
Take the messaging system for example. I think of it as a conversation myself. Logically, then, the rules of a conversation should apply. But they don't. Questions get no answers. Accusations get made. It's amazing how easy it seems for people to insult you and just drop off line when there's nothing you can do about it. And it isn't just relative strangers. These can be people you know fairly well, people you see at work or school or wherever. It's disheartening.
Part of this is being separated. Profile picture notwithstanding, you aren't there talking to the person so there isn't the same kind of accountability. There can be other factors. Sometimes I run across what I think of as the "Digital Mob" effect. One or more people will pick a target, trying to drive the pagan from the virtual village as it were. The usual goal seems to be to stir up the page administrator to the point where the target is "defriended," which leads to perhaps my biggest point of sadness.
I have been in a lot of heated conversations over the years. I have always done my best to maintain my temper and manners. Sometimes I have failed. I have always done my best to defend, listen, evaluate, reason, and take what was said and go forward. One idea that never entered my mind was that the conversation was mine to do with as I pleased, or that the thoughts and the ideas of others were mine. So, when I think back to all the times that people have said to me on Facebook "My page, my rules," I get a little sick to my stomach.
I understand the need for some rules in any environment, probably better than most. But to propose that you control the thoughts and views expressed in a public forum (and it is a public forum, make no mistake) to that degree simply because your name is at the top of the page is reflective of the intolerance so prevalent in our country these days. This is the type of person that banishes others who disagree quickly. And as they do, they become more and more accustomed to hearing only similar views, and so become even more intolerant. Eventually, the slightest dissent is considered virulent hostility, which is where we are headed.
So I am leaving Facebook, and here I am. My New Year's Resolution is to write an entry at least twice a week. I want to inform, to educate. Hopefully I will inspire some thought and possibly entertain. I might even be read by a few people. But read or not, here I come.
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